Requiem

What is all the art in the world to fill my soul?
what is all the knowledge in the world to fill my mind?
what is there of myself walking under the moon with a troubled heart and unheard cries?
knowledge, art and all pleasantries,
all of them as feasible, and oh, how ridiculous of me to pretend your kiss…

Embracing you, quenching my thirst in you,
Oh such a painful endeavor for my heart to withstand….
For even my wits they fail me and I see they are embraced by hopelessness,
and this bitter hopelessness takes my heart for a dance,
and dance and dance, under the melody of a Requiem,
while the heart weeps inconsolably,
and for a halt of the suffering this heart is begging,
Why should my heart ask for such a terrible thing?
for It has to weep, mourn and bleed
and embrace the sorrow and all its deeds!

The sorrow is the art of the heart,
and tears are the stars that shine in the soul,
and my being nowhere to be found next to my sweet love,
is the torment of them all,
and hence all my constitution trembles in desperation,
acknowledging the presence of Love that simply runs away from my affection…
and many a questions are born, and burnt in fire,
and their ashes are blown away by the cold wind that with a dagger my heart slashes…

I have looked upon Love and this has shown me pure scorn,
and I have pervaded myself in her knowledge,
but just as futile my deeds were, for she disregarded me in utter contempt,
and thus all the world loses its magnificence before my eyes,
leaving just a trail of an almost forgotten purpose,
leaving a choir of unheard cries.

The whole world withers as I sing and dance in pain,
a melody that caresses me once and again,
and the only purpose now is that of an old dream,
that shapes itself in front of me as a red sunset,
bathing me in red light, permitting me to see her one more time,
out of selfishness, eager to embrace me…tightly.

Oh Death of mine!
you have finally come to rescue the creature you so much adore,
the creature that you have nourished many nights of old,
and whose tears you have guarded as a treasure that should not be thrown,
Oh Death of mine, embrace me and use thy power to vanquish my suffering,
and permit me to behold the scorn of Love once more,
and thence I shall wave to her my last farewell,
and with different eyes I shall see her as she vanishes,
Oh Love what have you done to this heart of mine?,
this heart of mine that beholds you withering away before my eyes…

Oh Death, you shall be part of this final Art,
let this saddened Requiem be a hymn for a desperate soul,
who can withstand no more the cruelties of the world ,
the contempt of Love.

I beg of you hold my final breath, and with thy cold dagger put my soul to rest,
for the one I adored was my last wish on earth, oh….
the one I desired, the one I will never get.

RQ
Moscow
8.1.11